21 October 2011

my mind is running away from me

I seem to have unintentionally formed some sort of tradition that requires me to stay up right into the early hours of the morning at the start of every holiday. It's 2:12 am on the first day of the October half term and here I am again; laying in bed writing this because for the first time in weeks sleep seems to actually be running away from me. It's nights like these when my inner mind comes out to play; that constant voice deep inside my head that never wants to leave me alone and always wants to chat.

I've been noticing that it's getting stronger for a while now, the relationship between physical me and spiritual me building and I can literally spend hours having conversations with myself. I like it though; without it I would get very lonely.I think that this spiritual voice is part of the reason I am starting this blog; an outlet for my little voice and saving me from constantly being the recipient this tiresome, relentless curiosity that is my inner mind is spouting.

I am creating for myself a world away from the stress of daily life, especially the reams of schoolwork I am constantly suffocating beneath. This is a world where all of that can be locked away with a huge brass key with shimmering fairy wings.

Because my mind is currently overflowing, I decided to make a list of my half-term tasks and goals. I'm not normally one for lists, but this time the situation called for it, and this is the over-ambitious amount I managed to come up with:
  • art coursework obviously
  • doing a page or two of my scrapbook, which I haven't updated since my birthday despite my best intentions
  • clearing out my wardrobe and hopefully selling some of my awful year 7 purchases
  • sorting my d of e volunteering, probably at the Cancer Research shop in Chiswick
  • choreographing more dance
  • going to the Topshop outlet in Edgware to stretch my £40 vouchers as much as physically possible because I am a cheapskate
  • posting more looks on my currently very lonely lookbook
  • hemming up the fabric I bought in Goldhawk last weekend for my bed
  • finishing the book I'm reading, 'how good people turn evil' which is extremely interesting but not exactly the lightest of reads
  • making a tutu for my Halloween constume
I endeavor to keep posting during the week, and perhaps I'll be able to reflect back on this list and see how much of it I actually got done. Still, no one got anywhere without ambition...

And finally, I don't like plain posts, so I've included a few pictures of my treasured fairy collection to add some magic.

Love Ella.


  1. hello ella! <3 <3 i'm actually IN LOOOOOOOVE with your blog literally, i feel so enchanted by your words tehe. omg i was thinking about volunteering in the chiswick cancer research because whenever i go past it, i always see a ray of wonderful clothes! where abouts is the topshop outlet?? and i love your collection of fairies, they're so beautiful

  2. Mary! aww thank you that made me so happy :) I went in yesterday and she said I can start next saturday, i know it's such a mad and exciting place hehe. In Edgware, it's really like low key but my mums friends daughter went and apparently its all like buy one get one free and really discounted!

  3. omgosh ah so lucky! charmaine and i are going there on monday to ask. do you have to say its for d of e or something? or can you just say can we volunteer? :)
    yeah i just researched it and it looks amazing! ah i'm so poor though -__-

  4. yep pretty much, well I phoned up before and then she said to come in, and yeah just asked about volunteering :) and then she asked me if it was for dofe. ergh i know same, its so sad :(

  5. ah well i'm sure by the time you come back to it you'll have a handful of wonderful clothes :) when are you planning to go to the topshop outlet?omgosh i just noticed that big chunky crystal sitting on your table! ahhh want one so bad they're so beautiful!